Be Carefull What You Ask For

It seems like just yesterday I was changing diapers and warming up bottles, I clearly remember his first pair of Jordan's or those slick Baby Gap outfits and the stroller with the 4X4 wheels that had shock absorbers, I remember the late night trips to 7-11 for a bottle of formula or maybe Orajel for the teething, then I remember the first day of school walking this cat to class and him looking at me like "Dude are you really gonna leave me here with these strangers?" I remember the first wrestling, football, baseball practices and all the games, its almost like a dream. The other day when I woke in the middle of the night, I heard this strange voice coming form my son's room, not the usual pip-squeak voice I have known forever, but this baritone Barry White type with a He-Man laugh, I jumped up and ran into my sons room with the biscuit (sorry mom I live in a very urban city). Imagine my surprise that it was little Mr. Baby Gap himself listening to the Quiet Storm and on the phone? I went back to bed scratching my head. I have been there for every aspect of this kids life and didn't even realize what I was witnessing, luckily I have an obsession with camera's so I went back to all the old photo albums and the pictures pretty much told the story. I spent so much time worrying and molding and scolding and preaching and praying that I never stopped to look at the finished product, I mean at 13 the product isn't finished but the foundation is there. My Little man is a teenager now with his own personality and attitude, He catches the bus to school and hangs at the mall with his buddies, he actually brushes his hair and teeth without me having to remind him, he does homework and gets good grades. The reality of it is that he will be gone in less than 5 years, living his life and being a productive member of society, In 10 years, he will be a Tuskegee University graduate ( I mean is there any other school that can compare?)with a good job and possibly a family. As a parent of a teenager, all I can advise is that you take the time to enjoy the little things and take plenty of pictures. The reality of the situation is that my son is growing into a fine young man and hopefully all my tutelage has paid off. Im sure I still have plenty of work still to do but soon all Ill be able to do is advise him.

The streets are watching

Its been a long minute since I’ve been in the blog world. I would say that I had writers block, but you actually need to be a writer to have a block right? I only blog when the spirit hits me. I usually read other peoples stuff and it influences me. I need to be in a certain place to get going. A few things hit me this summer like MJ passing away. I ran right home to fire up the computer but then I realized that even though I know most of his songs word for word, I’m no authority on him, I didn’t have the jacket, glove or button. I never went to a MJ show so I decided to sit that one out. My stepmother passed away a few days after MJ and that had way more of an effect on me. My step mom and dad hooked up when I was six so she has been in the game for a minute. They have two kids who I consider to be my real-life sisters; I love them more than life. My relationship over the years with stepmother has been off and on. It probably has more to do with the fact that she was no real relationship to me so I could actually express how I felt whereas with my father, I had to pretty much swallow my pride. As I was thinking about how my father and sister must feel that they lost a mother and a wife, I started to think; damn I lost a stepmother, with the exception of my mother and father, who knew me better than her? Probably most of the times when people pass away all the bad things they did in life don’t seem so bad and all the mediocre things are magnified to greatness. Things they did that you didn’t understand at the time all seem to make sense now. Now that I’m thinking about it, my stepmother was my outlet, I would only see her on the weekends and she would most of the time give me the clearance for anything I wanted. I was the first kid on the block to drive before the age of 16. I usually had the most money on our little trips to the corner store. When my father was mad at me she would usually calm him down and within the hour I was out of trouble, all these things I took for granite. Most of the time when people are alive we don’t appreciate them like we should. I miss my stepmother, not because she isn’t here anymore but because I didn’t appreciate her to the fullest when she was here. I miss MJ for the same reasons, I never ever in a million years thought either one of them would die and the thought never crossed my mind. OK that’s it for know as I get back into the swing of things. Thanks Lisa B for inspiring me to get back in the game.

Let that Ish go!

If you hold on to grudes for over one year, it eats at your soul. Im being very generous with the one year rule because I suffer some this very disorder. I have a friend who told me if your girlfriend breaks up with you, you will be depressed for one month per as many years as you all went together, so for example if you went together for two years, it would talk 24 monthes for you to be completly over her. I have another friend who's father was an asshole all her life and she still feels the effects of the abuse and neglect. My advise to her is LET THAT SHIT GO! Im sure its been a hard road to travel and Im sure it left many scars, but at the same time how do you get the ultimate payback? As my mother would always say "Never let then see you sweat." I think you need to let it go because as your soul gets weaker you dont have the energy to put towards positive things. If its something that eating at your soul speak on it. Get some therapy, grab a drink at the bar and vent to a friend. Do whatever you need to get it off your chest. Life is too short for you to be harping on old ish! This blog is actually dedicated to specific people who I know read it.

Indicted!!

So What! I looked up the definition of the word indicment. My take was that it means we are formally charging you with what we already charged you with? OK, my son didnt clean his room and I scolded him, but to write in an official capacity that he didnt clean his room room would be to indict him? So basically it dosent mean anything. You are not being charged with the crime, your just being accused. Somebody please correct me if im wrong. My boss is an asshole and everybody knows it so if I put it in writing and hand it to him. He's Indicted? My boy always says he got me for drinks at the bar but I know he dosent so next Im going to indict him on bullshittery? Maybe Im tripping.

Baltimore...Really?

So I had a oppurtunity to go the Ledgends Of Hip-Hop show at the Hippodrome a few weeks ago and I was pumped, The line up included KRS-One and Slick Rick which by the way is enough for me! As the date got closer I kept hearing about more MC's getting adding like Sweet-Tee, Kool M Dee, Whodini, The Trecherous Three, MC Lyte and more. I searched high and low for the exact line up just to prove my point even more but no luck. The whole week leading up to the show I was getting more amped, I was trying to get my people to go but my cheapskate friends were crying about the price. ( Not you Aub) Yeah I know we are in a recession and gas is high and blah-blah-blah but this is a show most of you so-called hip-hop heads should be selling your souls to see, I mean these are the pioneers right? These were the first to ever do it right? Since your so down and know ever word to La-di-da-dee and The Bridge Is Over, hell,these are some of the guys who influenced those guys. I had an old hisotry professor who said , if you dont know the history of your author, you dont know what you have read. He also said all social problems are economic and all economic problems are political and all political problems are presupposed by the military means, but thats clearly another blog. Getting back to my original issue, the show was cancelled because the promoter sold less than 300 tickets! Baltimore. Really? Baltimore MC's get the top award for crying about how come they dont get any recognition outside of Baltimore. HELLO! We only had a chance to hear some real hip-hop and also pay our respects but it seems like only 300 of us even care about the old school. So now we have to ask ourselves are we really hip-hop. I was even excited to go to the Red and Meth show at the Sonar on a Sunday night with Keith Murray opening....cancelled. My grandmother use to always say baby, dont look a gift horse in the mouth. Its seems as though we had two horses with gifts and not only did we look them in the mouth, we kicked them in the ass. Baltimore...Really?