Nothing astonishes men more than plan dealing and common sence!!

In my absence I came up with a set of rules to live by.......


The measurement of my finger from the tip to the first joint is 1 inch...depth for planting peas.
The measurement to the second joint is 2 inches...depth for corn.
Return borrowed things in better shape than when you borrowed them.
There are two types of trouble...one is the trouble you knowingly walk into, the other is trouble that just happens...it's important to know the difference.
Walk softly but carry a big stick.
if you have to use said stick, make sure who you use it on, doesn't get up.
Grits is good.
Foul language is a sign of a limited vocabulary
Orion, the Big and Little Dippers.
Everyone is a friend until proven otherwise.
Licorice ferns, huckleberries, nettles, sword ferns.
Tabasco won't kill you even if you eat it by the spoonfull.
Don't watch the clock when you're at work.
Fish can see you if you look over the side of the boat.
Fish can hear you if you talk to loud.
Respect the elders.
Never go to bed angry.
That which does not kill you will hurt like the dickens, but it will make you stronger.
Family is the most important thing on earth.
How to play the guitar, spoons, mouth harp, and water filled bottles.
The true meaning of "Self Made Man"
If you don't know something, go to the library and learn it.
The phrases "I don't know", "I forgot", or "I tried (and failed)" are excuses.
There is a difference between an excuse and a reason, know the difference.
Take care of your apperance...even if it is just a t-shirt and jeans.
The world can change everything about you, except your point of view...unless you allow it to.

Your actions effect others..... IDIOTS

Zack Sowers ARTICLE

This is a sad state of affairs. I am guilty of not really caring unless the tragedy hits close to home and believe me in the past couple of years, Tragedy has had a room at my house. This is no different because I’ve been that dude walking home slightly tipsy from Fells or Canton all by my lonesome through Patterson Park. I don’t feel bad for Zack because he’s not here anymore, I feel terrible for all the people he left behind. I feel so bad for his wife and family and friends, then I start to think what if something like that happened to me, how my mother would take it, man I don’t even want to think about it. What influence would that have on my son? What about all my friends, my sisters? I know for a fact that most people aren’t nearly as sensitive as I am but my heart feels so bad for them. I didn’t cry when Dukie fell off but I was very upset.(shut up Ginneh, Nikki and Dany) I know these dudes were black or Spanish or whatever and by know I usually have my guns loaded and I’m ready to hit the Jesse/Rev Al warpath but this time I don’t even have the energy. Regardless of what color anybody was I feel terrible for the people left behind. Maybe if you’re reading this and you’re feeling like doing whatever, please think about the effect your actions will have on others.

Tuskegee Is The Pride Of The Swift Growing South

I know I know its been a minute. I just got put on to this Web-site for my School. its more like a myspace but only for Tuskegee University. My home-girl Tammy put me on and its like being back at school all over again. You dont realize how much your college friends really mean to you. Its been about 12 years since I finished and most of my friends on this page are all grown up and married/divorced with kids and jobs and responsibilities and its crazy. I remember when getting the lemons for tequila Friday was the order of the day. Its great to see all my friends doing well and enjoying life it seems. I havent been to homecoming since I left but 08 seems like it might be the year!

She Like me, she tolerate me, she hate me?

So I was chatting it up with the crew the other day, you know kicking the Willie bobo's, after we decided that if Majic Johnson had to play Air Jordan right now that Majic would win that game and a supersonic hydo-boosted skateboard with nitros would beat a pair of rollerskates equipped with jets for each skate plus a big fan strapped to your back , we got on the subject of females. If you like a chick more than she likes you then its curtains and vice versa. For us dudes when you like that chick you will do it all, thats what I call the loveydovey stage. Everybody is perfect in that stage, corny jokes are funny as hell, when you have to wait like 6 hours for her to be ready it wasnt no big deal, when she ordered some shit that cost twice what you ordered it wasnt a thang. As soon as that stage is over is when you can tell if its gonna work. Jokes arent as funny, your patience ass aint so paitience, your pockets just got alittle tighter. If youll can make it through that stage then its on and poppin. We also decided that if your girl comes home late at night and her socks are pulled all the way up she was cheating, this means she just pulled then up when she was getting dressed like 15 minutes ago.

P.S. The Incredible Hulk is faster then the Bionic Man but they have to race on a smooth surface because the Hulk dosent have shoes!

EPMD was better than TRIBE

We would rather have a ugly girl than a pretty monster

Wal Mart is crack

I think I hate everything Wal-Mart stands for or maybe im just venting. When your opening statement to me is "I dont work in this department plus Im on break." then I peep your name tag and it says ALEXUS and then I ask you if you could maybe possibly find it in your kind heart to please, no wait, pretty please with fresh new pair of doorknocker earrings with a matching gold tooth to match, point me in the right direction before you finish texting because I know you hate your job and you hate dealing with people but for some unknown reason you took a job as a customer service rep at a place where people might probably need some help and god forbid they ask you because right under ALEXUS it does say ASK ME FOR HELP I mean what the hell was I thinking?

My Pet Peeve Blog is bigger than you thought

These are a few things that just irk me to death, Im probable guitly of some of these but hell, theycallmescootermonk and Im sure thats a pet peeve to some. This list will def grow so feel free to add some, I might have open a ugly can of worms..

NUMBER 1 WAL-MART WORKERS
1. People who laugh loud at non-funny things
2. Any spoken word artists
3. People don't know the difference between 'Yield' and 'Merge'!!
4. People who drive slow in the fast lane
5. Bokeem Woodbine
5.1 Any dude who is on that show I love New York except the midget.
6. Animal cruelty, people that don't use their turn signals, tailgaters, and people that drive suv's that think that their God's gift to other driver's
7.People who blow their horn at you the nano-second the light changes to green.
8.Having to explain the same thing more than once.
9.Rude and mean people.
9.1 Forrest Whittaker
10.Materialistic and shallow people
11.People who flaunt their wealth and status
12.1 David Allen Grier after Living Color.
12.People who thinks Liberal Arts is a major.
12.1 Shouting "drop it" the moment a conversation veers into an unwanted direction
13.Girls who say they're a virgin but you know they are not.
14.Ignorant and racist people.
15.Black republicans
14.1People who hate on Beyonce
15.people who complain about the awful things our government does, but they don't question authority.
15.1 Black people who call other Black people boughie but when you ask then to describe boughie but they cant. Then they go to 12.1 or 16
16.no-it alls that don't know anything and are irrational in their reasoning to begin with.
17.people talking at the movies--especially when they have to repeat everything we just heard.
17.1 Gary Coleman now
18. hate it when I make stupid mistakes.
19. People who answer their cell phone and keep saying hello hello hello when its obvious no one there.
20. One-uppers on everything you say.
21. People who work customer services jobs they hate and have an atitude with you.
22. The way Wilford Brimley says the word diabetes.
23. Bob Johnson Post BET
24. This guy at my job who talks loud but says nothing
25. Im sure I said this one already but excuse makers kill me!!!
26. People who lack common sence

Our cause speeds on its way

Happy Founders Day! G.O.M.A.B.

PHI BETA SIGMA

Respect Your Elders

Remember when all your mother had to do was look at you? Remember when you went to the mall on a half-day and Derrick McCains mom called everybodies parents and told? I used to be mortified of adults in my neighborhood especially when I was up to no good. My mom worked two jobs so I should have been good right? Hell no, those nosey snooping other parents were so quick to bust my bubble. I used to hate them but now all I can say is good-looking.

I specifically remember the one time I talked back to my mother and trust, It didnt end up good for me, I also remember like it was yesterday the one time I sucked my teeth and rolled my eyes. The purpose of this blog was because I was at my sons school the other day and the parent was cussing out the teacher in front of the student, im sure because Lil Mike-Mike was an asshole in class. You could look at his mother and tell exactley why he was what he was. When does respect start. I was always taught to repect old folks no matter what. I was taught that when grown folks are speaking you shut up and be still. Children are to be seen and not heard and all that. We need to get back to those days ASAP!

Rakim was SICK!!!

NO, for real, the 18th letter had the flu but still graced us Baltimorons with his presence. The opening acts had way more enery and kept the crowd hype.( It was OGUN and this dude naamed Salim, This was another one of those shows were only the real hip hop heads were out. Remember earlier when he didnt show up with Ghost. He apologized and promised us we were in for a treat. When you really think about it how much energy could a mellow smooth brother thats laid back such as the "R" bring?

It was a great trip down memory lane. I usually never sing along with MC's but this was Rakim Allah. He started off the hit, "I came in the door...." the crowd finished the rest of the song. What more could an MC want. At one point he sat down and asked us what song we wanted to hear. The crowd answered with at least 10 different songs from Mahoganoy to Eric B for President to Juice to Let the Rhythm Hit'em.

Rakim has some new material and thats when I remembered how much I cant stand the Sonars sound system (Shut up JO) and to be totally honest, I wasnt interested in hearing any new material from arguably one of the greatest to ever do it. You need a nice quiet corner of the world to really appreciate Rakim lyrics for the first time. OK ima get those links up for the other MC's tonight.

I was gone for a minute but now Im back with the Jump Off !!

Whats going on peops. Havent been on in a minute with work and all. Instead of being the moocher I decided to hook up the dinner this year for the fam. How hard could it be to slap a turkey in the oven and have a few sides for the fam right? Well, I had no friggin idea what I was getting myself into. Had to clean the crib, buy all the food and then cook it. I have vegetarian cousins, I have family members who dont like family members. I have old and not so old family members who still consider me to be the little scootermonk from like 25 years ago. I have family members who drink like we are still in prohabition.(sp) I have family members who have ex's that other family members dont like but dont get the hint and still come through anyway. My family is brutal when it comes to cracking jokes and if you show one sign of sensitivity about anything then its on and popping. They thrive on signs of weakness and pounce like that tiger in San Fransico. (my bad that was mean)All that to say when your the host you have to carefully orchestrate the whole shing-ding. I have much more respect for my aunts and uncles who pulled it off without a hitch all those years before. In the end all was well. We even ended up doing all the line dances known to man and I think everbody had a goodtime. I wont find out until next year how good I did. The plus is after all was said and done I have lefover food for a year and enough liquor for whoevers New Years party get graced with my presence. Good looking to my little sister for the collard greens and Ma- Dukes for the rolls.

P.S. I situated my computer at work for optimal privavcy so im back in EFFECT (in your best Rakim voice) Peace to my girl Shae-Shae.

Knee-Gro Pahleese!!

1. boughie
a stuck up person who thinks they're better than others

I dont know what's wit Laquesha. ever since she got a new boyfriend, she started actin all boughie.

2. boughie

High Class; acting rich or used to the finer things life has to offer

That hoe needs to stop actin boughie everybody knows she frontin.

Abbreviation for boughetto; derived from the terms bourgeois and ghetto: middle class ghetto

Darrell keeps his Ipod in a Crown Royal Bag; he is boughie as hell.

adjective
boughie

Boughie comes from the word bourgeois. Bourgeois is "Preoccupied with respectability and material values" according to Webster's College II dictionary. The term refers to a social group in Marxist theory opposed to the proletariat (the poor common people) in the class struggle. A boughie person acts as if they are a part of the ruling class, rich, even if they aren't. In other words: stuck up, too good for something, materialistic. Well you can stop acting boughie, asking for sushi

This word is so funny and most of the people who Ive asked for the definition say black people who forget where they came from or black people who think they are better then other people. KNEE-GRO PAHLEESE - My mom is boughie because she wouldnt let me play over at Spiceberry apartments with my school friends. Was she looking down on them or maybe looking out for her sons safety? ( Any kid knows you have more fun plying in the Jects) Maybe I am boughie because I used to hang on the corner and drink 40's with my boys Tone, TJ Aub and Ro-Ro, but now I chill in the living room and drink Carona's by the caseload while watching SVU or smackin up my son and anybody else in Wii bowling. My father called me boughie because I passed on some fried chicken. Well dad, remember when the Dr. said no more fried foods after you had that heart-attack. Remember that? It would seem that this word has no true definition but more a perception of what you or someone else thinks of you.

Ive Never Seen A Man Cry Until Ive Seen A Man Die

The funny thing about blogging is that it consumes your whole 8 hour work day. I have so much to do when I get off work, when does my friggin boss expect me to blog?

I was hurt by this news on several levels.(these levels arent in any particular order) One being the fact that I am a avid redskins fan and he was a hard-hitting MO-FO. Second is the fact that he leaves behind a new family. Thirdly is the fact that this is another blackman lost to nonsence. I myself being a blackman have lost several friends and relatives to nonsence. I hate to admit it but I automatically assumed this was another case of black on black crime. They dont have any witnesses or clues for that matter so why would I think such a thing? Have I been systematically programmed by..."The Man" Ive been in a daze for the last few couple of days thinking to much. Ive been enjoying reading other blogs. You guys keep me on point. Its Friday night and im on my way to an old head party to re-invigorate my soul. Ill finish this later its almost 5 O'clock.

202AM - Back from the old head party. It did the trick in getting me back to my regular self. I love to listen to older folks, they have alot of knowledge, I was told Im to young to have such deep thoughts, I need to take a deep breath and let some of the weight of the world off my shoulders and sip my Remy a tad bit slower to appreciate the taste. Life is way to short. Tipsy old folks have tons of advice. They knew off the break the killers were black. I attempted to throw the "your generalizing" curveball which they immediatley knock out of the park. I think the general consensus was that I need to live and learn a little more. As they cracked jokes and reminisced about how they used to be just like me, I stubbornly told them that times have changed and its not how it used to be WAY back in the day. I was sent to the store for ice and cigerettes. I guess the more things change the more they stay the same.

P.S. Not one but two lazy eyes?

Am I one of those people???

I asked one of my good friends what I should blog about today and she said I should write about mooching family members who come over to eat your food and drink all your alcohol and dont even think to contribute. I was like yeah, those are a lazy, irresponsible,dis-respectfull group of people. Then when I thought about it, Am one of those people? Im going to my mothers house for dinner. I might bring a 12 pack of Yuenglings but mom dosent drink, then Im going to my pops house probably with same said 12 pack. My father strickly drinks dark liquor , no beer. After I leave both houses you know I have commandeered enough food to last me a month. My last stop is one of my best friends house with by now a 3 pack, he has a wet bar complete with a keg-a-rator full of Heineken. I wonder if she was talking about me? Probably not...right?

Thats my man to the end

This here is my man fiddy. We grew up together since before this picture. We have always been close, but as time went on we choose seperate paths, mine was the school route and his was the street one. We always keep in contact but our values and beliefs somewhere along the way changed. I remember one time in 7th grade, he skipped school with the "bad crowd", they waited for the bell to ring and then jetted across the street into the woods. I was supposed to go but of course I was a straight up shook one.(plus Mark Turner was there!) All through high school my man was definatley on some other level. Our friends became different but for some reason he and I still remained tight. The first time he got arrested, it was in the paper, he was caught in a stolen car. The second time was for drugs. My mother always would say your judged by the company you keep, but being true to my cancerian ways Im very loyal to my friends. Of course now he wasnt allowed over to my house anymore and we werent supposed to hang-out. When it was time for me to go away to college, he already had his own place and a new Maxima ( the old skool square one) I used to hangout at his place the summer before I left. I didnt want to go away to school but you guys already know Ma-dukes wasnt having it. Enough babbling, not even sure where im going with this one. I wonder what one set of events or occurences happened in either one of our lives to make us turn out so differently. My man has been in jail for a couple years now and we still stay in contact. It could has so easily been him in my shoes and me in his.

Ghost RA and Scootermonk!!

Tonight is the night like Betty White. Im on my way to see RAKIM! I did all my chores, everything wifey asked for, It was no problem, I painted the kitchen, I cleaned my closet (no pun intended) I raked the leaves, took shorty to get a haircut washed the dishes, vacuumed, dusted, cooked dinner went to the mall for 6 friigin hours....no sweat. My boy Roy is on his way over to pre-game. I got a case of Yuengling's and some Remy. You gotta get your head right,right? Ive been waiting for this moment for a while. Ive never seen Rakim live. Rakim of Eric B. and Rakim. I think I know ever lyric this dude ever wrote. Ive been waiting for this moment for years. My #1 and #2 are KRS and The R. Ive seen KRS several times. Ive seen EPMD, Ive seen Tribe and Dela. I remember exactly where I was when I heard both Biggie and Tu-Pac were killed. Im a hip-hop head and can debate with the best of them even though I grew up in the Burg. The tickets are 35 beans. The crew was like that a tad bit step!! I was like thats it? to see one of the ledgends. One of the pioneers who paved the way for 125 dollar Jigga? HEY Abdul - can I get a Rakim song on your show. OK im Audi 5000 G's. Ill hit you back and tell how great the show was

Rakim was a no-show, After Ghostface gave up a great show, The club Sonar hit us with the old "Rakim is stuck in traffic on 95 but will be here in 20 minutes" trick. Well 45 minutes and 5 brews later we got hit with the enevitable news that The R will not be making it but if we all come back on Dec.28th he will give us a special show. I guess I can wait. I still stay true to hip-hop. There have been a few rough spots but through-out our relationship, the good out weighs the bad. Sometimes when Hip-Hop is pissing me off I remineise, check out this Blog from Shae-Shae